When it was New: 2013 Porsche 911

When Porsche Canada sends a new 911 Carrera Cabriolet to test—in February – I wonder how the heck I’m going to test it with the top down in winter without freezing.

Sure it has a great heater, but it’s minus 20˚C today and the forecast for the rest of the week is for unrelenting cold although the sun will shine.

Then I remember my friend Frosty, who claims to be a descendant of the Snowman who came to life one winter day long ago.

Who better than a bonafide winter wunderkind to take this 2013 example if the Teutonic tourer on a test trip in the frozen countryside?

Half expecting to get the cold shoulder, I invite him to be a guest reviewer. He thinks it’s a cool idea to get into a hot car.

Besides, he says, the black-on-black Porsche is a nice contrast to his white complexion.

It’s a one-switch deal to drop the top and set things up for the Frosty expedition. Once in the driver’s seat, he looks right at home with his pipe, his touque and scarf and shirt I loaned him.

He likes the adjustability and feel of the cold leather seat and sport design steering wheel, not to mention the chilly feel of the shifter for the seven-speed manual transmission.

“Nice,” he says. “I suppose you warm-blooded types would prefer the top up, but I like the open air and the temperature is ideal.”

He looks over the gauges and controls, his button eyes shining. “I see it has an awesome audio system. Ah, and navigation. That will help me avoid the hot spots.” (Even snowmen have a sense of humour, apparently.)

I huddle in the passenger seat, bundled up as though going for a dog sled ride rather than in a high-performance automobile.

He fumbles a bit with the key (hey, his fingers are cold) before firing up the 350-hp horizontally-opposed 6 cyl. engine. When it roars to life, I notice a sort of frozen smile on Frosty’s face as he firmly grips his briar pipe. I suspect he’s wondering whether the thrust of 288 lb. ft. of torque will separate his head from his body.

“I love that sound,” he says.

Then we’re off. Quickly. Frosty’s head remains in place.

I know what he’s feeling. I’d been in the car for a couple of days (with top up and heater on) before Frosty’s foray and I love the feeling of power under my foot. I love the clutch action and the way the shifter slips smoothly from gear to gear.

Engine stop/start doesn’t quite compensate for a heavy foot on the gas, but it does help cut consumption.

There’s not much wind getting into the front seat area, but what does blow in is cold. I turn on the seat heat for my side and hunker down a little. Every exhale brings a cloud of vapour.

I’m cold. Frosty continues to grip that pipe, smile fixed on his face, scarf flowing in the wind.

The 911 barrels along, the McPherson strut front suspension and multi-link LSA rear suspension soaking up any humps and bumps we encounter. The ride is firm, but not so stiff that it’s uncomfortable.

We’re headed for a curvy section of two-lane highway and Frosty is moving a tad quickly. I’m hoping he doesn’t freeze behind the wheel in the sharp bends.

Cornering is flat and the power rack-and-pinion steering responds instantly to driver demands. If things get a bit squirrely, Porsche stability management leaps to the rescue using ABS, ASR, ABD and EDTC to maintain a safe course.

Frosty gets us back home safely without needing to use any of the alphabet of safety systems and with all of the eight airbags intact.

“Nice ride,” he says. “I really like everything about it even if it hasn’t changed from 2012.”

I have to agree, except for the horrible rearward visibility with the top up, something Frosty didn’t experience.

I head into my office for a few minutes, leaving Frosty in the driver’s seat to get a last look around.

I come out a few minutes later to find he’s gone.

“Frosty! Frosty! Where the heck are you,” I call. Then I look into the car.

Omigawd, I had forgotten to warn him about the meaning of that seat-shaped icon with the wiggly lines.

He had activated it.

On the seat I see a touque, a scarf, a briar pipe, an empty shirt, a puddle.  And a couple of rapidly melting snowballs.

2013 Porsche 911
Trim level: Carrera Cabriolet
Price as tested (before taxes): $123,200.00
Freight: $1,085.00
Configuration: front-engine, rear drive
Engine/transmission: 3.4L 6-cyl. Boxer/ 7-spd manual
Power/torque: 350 hp/ 288 lb-ft
Fuel economy ratings: 10.7 L/100km city; 7.3 L/100km hwy
Warranties: 4years/ 80,000 km (comprehensive)
Competitors: Audi R8, Infiniti G Coupe, Mercedes-Benz SL550

Related links:
Porsche Canada